mentally drained

i am...
the top can be a very lonely place
and the thing about complaints and winey employees is that little by little
they chip away at you
how can i alone handle the baggage of 11 people
my back is starting to hurt
if only my partner where here to lend a hand ::sigh::

i need a mental break soon..before i break...

self-love

"learn to love yourself, before you can love someone else"

sometimes you get caught up in the way someone loves you and makes you feel that you forget you first have to figure out how you can make yourself happy and how you make you feel

drunk dialing

"Picture perfect memories scattered all around the floor
Reachin' for the phone cause I can't fight it anymore
And I wonder if I ever crossed your mind
For me it happens all the time

It's a quarter after one, I'm all alone and I need you now
Said I wouldn't call but I lost all control and I need you now
And I don't know how I can do without
I just need you now

Another shot of whiskey can't stop looking at the door
Wishing you'd come sweeping in the way you did before
And I wonder if I ever cross your mind
For me it happens all the time

It's a quarter after one, I'm a little drunk and I need you now
Said I wouldn't call but I lost all control and I need you now
And I don't know how I can do without
I just need you now" ---Lady Antebellum

havent we all been there lol

"you're not at the age to be wasting time"
well what age is the age when you stop wasting time?
or when do people stop living and taking chances?
is it 21, 27, 50?
are we cartons of milk, that have to be out the shelves and used before time is up?
is there a race, a ticking clock...
i'm feeling the societal pressure to "conform"
when all i really want is to be 22 again?
is that too much to ask? lol

y mami dijo...

and she said...live your life
take risks...dont use my life as an example...
back in the day i didnt have many choices..but you...you have the world at your fingertips
you're educated, hard-working, independent...
if things dont work out you can move on and start again


so why so scared my child...dont deny yourself the opportunity to "know"
because one day you'll wake up at 50 and wonder where did it all go..
but then again i know what you're going through... u feel yourself letting go and for a moment you follow the road
and in a blink of an eye your running backwards away from the unknown into the safety of yourself...where it is still unknown...but an unknown you've grown to "know"
just let yourself go--

taking it in mom taking it in..

sin--dormir

i found a way to fight my insomnia...
sleep on the right side of the bed...
let ur memories sleep on the left...
that way there's no conflict
although i'm lying to my zzz's
my mind appreciates it...
my heart will eventually catch up to the deceitfulness of my sleeping habits...
but hopefully by then ur memories will have relocated